this is a blog.

This is a blog about feeling stressed out of one's mind because finals are almost here. It is a blog full of anxiety that's sure to hit within the next three days, a blog of hyperventilations and brain malfunctions.

This is a blog about the fear of what's about to happen next. It's about not knowing what's ahead. It's about a dark path with no light to guide the way, a blog of insecurities that never seemed to be present until now.

This is a blog about heartaches, a blog that represents the last twenty years of breaking hearts and having one's heart broken, from the first crush in elementary school to one-guy-a-season dating at the start of college. It is a blog that holds no love for love never came, never been felt, never existed.

This is a blog about finding God. It is about looking for something to believe in, about having hope, about faith. It is about holding on when holding on seems like the last thing one wants to do.

This is a blog about questions without answers, about things that can only be thought of at four in the morning as one is laying down next to the fast asleep companion, tired, but can't sleep because there's too many unexplainable thoughts flowing through and the hesitation to speak of it.

This is a blog about the realization that one's emotions have been sustained from society. It is all about the inability to rip out one's scared and sacred heart, throw it to the ground, and show it to the world saying "Take me as I am. Please" because it is too painful, because too much time has been spent being numbed, staying numbed.

This is a blog about hardly ever crying because of that numbness. This blog speaks of the tears that have already shed, the tears that can never be revealed.

This is a blog about knowing that someone is there, but suddenly feeling all alone.

This is a blog.